The First Solo Christmas

Girl always loved Christmas – especially cooking the meal!  

It was never an easy time.

o christmas tree

Christmas, especially the first one, was difficult.  Girl worked a lot of hours up to Christmas – getting the business running with a whole new team, not knowing what to expect and it was the busiest time of the year.

Girl bought a metal tree to hold candles because her condo could not hold the huge tree she would have loved for the boys.  Girl bought a topiary stand and covered it with green twinkle lights to add to the atmosphere.  It looked very sweet and the kids liked the different spin on Christmas decor.

Girl wondered what to get the boys, spent hours figuring it out only to be disappointed by the fact that their grandmother bought them the same thing.  Kids don’t know better so they told Girl.

The three spent Christmas Eve at Church with Girl’s parents and then girl dropped the boys back with their father.  Christmas morning, Girl picked Bubba and Peanut up to open presents and then go to MammaMia’s for lunch.  It was a nice day, although sad and awkward at times.  Girl and the 2 children took a super photo which was to become a Christmas tradition. Girl brought the children back to their dad’s house and went home to sleep.  Boxing Day would be busy at the business and she needed to be there by 6 am.  Girl cried herself to sleep that night.

It Starts to Fall Apart

Boy was gone and already communication started to fall apart. Lilith thought she ruled.  Thought she was in charge.  Portrayed herself as supermom, not the wishy-washy and soon to be vindictive, low self-esteem, wine guzzling bitch.  Lilith always had low self-esteem, still does.  She relies on Boy to get her jobs, works in the kitchen as ‘help’ though she tries to tell everyone she is the sous chef….when there are only 2 of you in the kitchen, you are the help.

Girl would call every night as she always did to say good night  to the children, now the phone was not being answered, or calls would go to voicemail, or messages not passed along. This was Lilith’s way of stemming communication and ties so that the boys would not want to leave to go elsewhere.  Her attempt at sending a message to Girl that she was now the mom.  This would not last!

The Sacrifice

Girl could not understand why he needed to be away from the children and find a job on the water.  Boy claimed that there were no jobs available in the area for someone of his calibre.  He had also looked across the country and even in the area where Girl was now living but did not find anything to his liking.  Boy thought that he was doing what was best by leaving the kids where they are and he making the sacrifice to go on the ship.  Some sacrifice.  He was going to party without his wife and kids around…knowing how he was with cigars, wine and other women, Girl knew that this was his escape plan finally hatching.

Many years ago, when Boy convinced Girl to let him go to Switzerland to get his chef papers, he had mentioned that it would be great to just cruise the world with no worries.  Guess Boy just made it happen with a different wife.