The Affidavits Start

Girl completed the affidavit outlining as many issues that have arisen with care of the children as she could possibly remember.  As a mom, Girl knew that the children needed to be with a parent…a biological parent….not Lilith…the stepmom of the wine bottle (oh, sorry, this story comes later).  Girl brought the bank documents about the house.  Girl was prepared to sell.  Because both their names were on the deed, this would not work. Girl was stuck working this out through the lawyers.

The affidavit process was long and emotional…lots of old anger dredging up, lots of wondering where the mistakes happened and of course assigning blame.  Girl will come to realize later that blame is not what is important, it’s getting it done quickly for the sake of the kids (and with the laws and inability of the family courts to actually do things quickly so that it is in the best interest of the children and not the lawyers).  This writing is happening 4 and a half years after the first signature was placed on a document…and it’s still not over.

Girl’s mom went to swear an affidavit outlining everything she knew about the care of the children or lack of, including all the care she provided.  Numerous times the children told her things that happened and begged her not to share it with their father because he would punish them.  Things like when they were sick at night, they would have to go get their own Tylenol and not go in Boy’s room; when Bubba’s ear was bleeding due to an ear infection, he was punished for soiling his pillow with blood; how Peanut was punished for teasing the dog even though the dog nipped Peanut in the face.  (and there is so much more…because Girl can hear it in the anger in the children’s voices when they mention things in passing).  This was good for MammaMia because she could let it out and everyone could know what a jerk Boy really was to the boys.  (needless to say, this was just the beginning of jerk-jackass status).

Call the Bank Back

Now to add to it…the Bank called Girl.  The mortgage was overdue 3 cycles with the 4th payment due the next day.  Funny,that was the same day Boy was leaving and Girl was meeting with Lawyer.  (Lawyer will now be the name for Girl’s Lawyer, Shrew will be the name for Boy’s lawyer when she finally appears in the story).

How does this all come about?  In the divorce decree, Girl left the house to Boy because that is where the children were living.  Girl tried over and over again to get him to get his own mortgage, but his credit and that of his little playmate cow didn’t mesh together to be able to get them anything. They had already over-leveraged themselves with cars – one each – and credit cards that were used to buy electronic toys, wine and beer.

The only reason Boy had the house was because of Girl’s job and credit..he needed to leave her on the mortgage and the deed because he would never have been able to get the mortgage himself.  In the past year, the mortgage had come up for renewal.  Boy had asked Girl to re-sign the mortgage because the bank would not give it to him alone.  Girl had to waste a Saturday tracking down the employees and the documents at the crazy bank he used because they couldn’t figure out how to get the process completed.

Call the Lawyer

So you are probably wondering why I have all this information.  Well, when I was working with lawyers on a different matter, notes were everything.  I would spend the regular eight hours of work working, and then spend another 2 to 3 making notes on every issues.  I got pretty good at it.  Something about this whole situation compelled me to write it down.  Fortunately it is also recorded in reams and reams of court documents….coming soon…be patient.

Well, Boy is going to be off and Girl calls her lawyer on Monday morning explaining what needs to take place. Of course an affidavit is required, that and a retainer….so every can understand this is not going to be cheap.  In fact, by the time all is said and done (and at the time of this writing it still is not) Girl could have sent both children to medical school and paid the mortgage on her house.  Anyway,   Girl books the appointment with Lawyer and made more notes. In the next two days, Boy left the country and Girl met with Lawyer.  Girl was still stunned.   Girl could still not believe that Boy would abandon his children.  Girl could not fathom what the children were actually thinking even though Boy fed them line after line about how this would be best for everyone.  Where in God’s green earth is it best for anyone to not live in the same home as a biological parent?  Yes, go ahead, lecture me on the unsafe situations of abuser and everything else, this is not the case for the homes of Boy or Girl.  But to actually have children raised by someone other than their biological parent when no other extenuating circumstances are present is absolutely ridiculous!

The Next Bomb

Boy explains to Girl that he had to look for work and that is why that, at times, the mortgage was not being paid, but that would change going forward.  Boy had landed a job with Holland America – that’s right!  A cruise ship line.  He would be a Sous Chef – not even the executive chef.  He would be travelling 4 months on with a 2 ½ month furlough and then he would go back for 4 months.  Girl is stunned.  Girl has no idea what to say, so instead she starts to write notes.  Boy stated that he would start working in two weeks but had to leave for Fort Lauderdale in 4 days and return sometime in August. Boy said he covered all this with the children and that they were fine with it.  They would miss him but he would send for them with the money he makes so that they could visit him on the ship (do you really think that’s going to happen??)

Girl asked about the residence of the children.  Boy stated that Lilith would take over parental duties in his absence.  Girl was terribly upset about that.  This woman had never had kids of her own, hardly cared for them during the time they were with the couple because the children spent more time at MammaMia’s than with her.  Girl was also very afraid of the complaints the children had made about her punishments for silly ‘infractions’ on rules that Lilith made up to be a hard-nosed stepmother who was practicing her own form of ‘tough love’.  Girl expressed her deep concern but Boy dismissed it.  Girl made it clear that she would be contacting a lawyer about getting the children removed from the stepmother’s ‘care’.